Friday, April 20, 2012

People say you should never bargain with God…

People say you should never with bargain God… which is what I did when doctors told me David was loosing the battle for his life.  On my knees I desperately begged God to spare David’s life and told him he could take anything and everything  from me.  


He spared my son and in the process heal my very wounded broken heart, for that I am forever grateful, but since we have been home everything else in my life has been falling apart. 

I am trying to remain positive and remind myself daily that God is my provider and strength, but it seems like everyday is getting more and more difficult.   Since we pulled through all of our medical issues my car has broke down, been hit in the parking lot of my school,  one of the toilets in my bathroom broke, I broke a tooth, I found out I failed my Arizona Education Proficiency Assessment (AEPA) and in addition I am having to fight with insurance companies/medical providers on a daily basis.  


I am eternally grateful for all of the Miracles and Wonder’s in our lives.  The people God has sent us, the donations, encouragement, support, and the opportunity to share our story, but  the chaos and obstacles we are facing in everyday life  needs to reside so that I can become stronger!    


Today, I am choosing to look up and push forward!  It has not been an easy choice, but I know God is my rock and at moments like these when I feel I can go no further or endure anymore, he always somehow gently reminds me that “He’s got this all under control”.


Satin the more you push me and try and distract me from what God has done, the more God will show me and the world what he can do!  I just need to focus on the things I can change,  get over myself, and let God handle everything else. 

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