Tuesday, November 24, 2015

I can't thank you all enough for all of love and support.

This weekend while in North California for my nieces wedding David started showing signs of the onset of a cold.  I immediately started him on Garlic oil, vitamin C, and Zicam.  We returned home on Monday night and on Tuesday morning I sent him to school and then returned to work to enjoy Thanksgiving festivities with my munchkins at school.  During breakfast I received a call from David's school that he was looking grey so they had the nurse check his oxygen saturation levels and his SAT's were at 74%.  They immediately put him on oxygen and called 911.

I still struggle with anxiety over David getting sick and that phone call this morning took me back to a place I try to avoid.  Not only was my baby in respiratory distress, but I was also not by his side.  I tried to pull myself together as I rushed to be by his side.

The last time David's oxygen saturation levels dropped that low was on February 23rd, 2012. I took David to the emergency room for a runny nose, and within hours his organs began to fail and I was told that he was not going to survive the night.  I waited by his bedside pleading with God to spare his life and after days of anxiously waiting for David to respond, breath, open his eyes, and smile again, God granted us the miracle I so desperately pleaded for.  It took a year for David to fully recover, but I am the other hand has spent the last three years trying to emotionally heal from the ordeal.

I know that my God is bigger than any fear or circumstance but I still struggle with severe anxiety over the thought of loosing David.  Ironically I don't fear death, my fear having to live life without David.  I continue to lay theses thoughts and feelings at God's feet.  So David and I are going to spend the rest of our day with Jesus as we both recover from our scare.

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