Almost three years ago David and I were blessed with a home makeover.  We were basically given a new home. All the burdens of our homes current condition, that weighed so heavy on my shoulders were lifted.  I could never repay all of our friends, strangers, and the companies that came together to make an accessible burden free home happen for us, but I did promise myself that I would one day find a way to pay those kind deeds forward.

In two days I will have the opportunity to be part of a team who is building a home for a family in Mexico.    The opportunity to make a difference in any life is special, but for me this Mission will be extremely meaningful!  I know and understand what it is like to struggle and I also know how exceptional it is to have a community of people support you and help make the dreams that seam out of your reach a reality.   Being part of this mission is an honor.  Thank you Bridget for your precious soul, kind heart, and your willingness to share this opportunity with myself and the other families.  I know that the end result will be life changing, not just for the family receiving the home but, also for the participants who are building it.

http://1mission.org

Learning To Love Yourself Is A Very Valuable Lesson!

The last year and a half has been extremely challenging for me.  I have faced my biggest fears, overcome heartbreaking trials, and as a result I was forced to reevaluate every idea and dream that I had spent the last 20 years creating.   It made me question my identity, value, and sometimes even my purpose.  At times I felt as if the storms would never end, which also made me question what would be left of me when and if the storm passed.   Through all of this, I learned the most valuable life lesson I could have ever learned.

That is...  Our trials, accomplishments, physical appearance, and/or our status mean nothing without God.  I had to face loosing anything and everything that I thought made me, to realize that God made me and that is all that matters.   I had to learn to love myself with or without  a partner, babies, a bigger house, a large savings account, a perfect body, or the approval of others.

For a period of time it seemed as if everything I had invested my life into was being ripped away from me in an instant.  I could not understand why the God I love and serve would allow this to happen in my life.  Now I know that God indeed had a purpose for my struggles.  He was developing a foundation that was not reliant on outside factors.  He was developing my faith and character while teaching me the most valuable lesson I had yet to learn.  The end result is the successful victory over a battle I have fought to overcome for as long as I can remember (a battle to love myself).   In my brokenness I had to rely on God and dig deep within my soul to find the value in me, to survive and overcome.  That I did.

I can not explain how incredible it feels to be at a place in my life that I can finally LOVE ME. I love me despite of me, no matter what I have, or who else approves of me.  I love me because the word of God says that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

I feel like I am running a race and I am almost to my finish line.  I am so close that I can feel and even taste the success, but when you have been running for so long that last stretch is the hardest.  I will not focus on how tired I am I will focus on how close I am to being where I have worked so hard to get.  Please keep my family in your prayers as we run our home stretch. 

No matter how beautiful people present themselves to be in public, God knows the truth of ones heart and that truth will eventually reveal itself.  It means nothing if you fool me because you can't fool my Lord and Savior and his vengeance is far greater than mine. I am not blind I just choose to let God fight my battles.

When you live your life this way, it can make it difficult to understand those who don't. Don't try and get on their level to understand.  Their lives will speak for themselves, all we can do is do our best to be our best. I strive for the acceptance of one person (JESUS) and I already have that.

It is amazing what happens when you quit chasing change and start chasing God!

I am beginning to notice that every time I go through a trial in my life the end result is a better ME. Through my brokenness and trials I have learned to cherish life and be content with what God has already given me.

For many years the burden of David’s health has plagued me.  I wanted more than anything in the world for my son to be healthy.  Naturally I longed for that but, after almost losing him three years ago I realized that I have a perfect child and our purpose on this earth is being fulfilled with our lives just as they are. 

As I have gotten older I have longed to be young again. There are days that lifting David and caring for him takes all the energy I have.  Recently after a cancer scare I realized how truly blessed I am that I even have the ability and strength to do what I do.  Everyday now, I count my blessings and thank God that he has given me strength and resilience to persevere. 

Once I hit my 30’s I felt this pressure of what my life should look like and be.  I had pursued an education and accomplished that, I own a home, have a great career, yet still felt inadequate because in my mind my fairytale ending included a prince charming and babies.   I was not allowing myself to enjoy the incredible life and accomplishments I had been blessed to experience due to the fact that I was placing my value in my marital status among other things. 

It is remarkable how God teaches me some of the most crucial life lessons through brokenness and situations far from ideal.  After an unfortunate experience with someone I thought could be a potential life partner I realized that my error was expecting anything or anyone but God to increase my value.   In this case I found that when I got what I thought I wanted and needed it felt as if my value was decreasing. 

I realized I was chasing my dreams and not Gods dreams for me.   Through my shattered dreams I realized that I don’t need health, youth, a partner, or anything temporary on this earth to complete me.  God has promised that “He who started a good work will be faithful to complete it” and I will stand on his promises. 

For the first time ever in my life the only thing I am chasing is Jesus.  Instead of seeking a partner or perfection,  I  now seek the Lord.  As a result I can now clearly see how God has abundantly blessed us.  How he has protected us and allowed unfortunate circumstances and encounters to build character and instill faith in our lives.   I am no longer driven by my desire for more.  I am learning to love myself and be content with who God has created me to be.  I am discovering how to love life just as it is, in the moment, regardless of the obstacles in our path. 

So often I would become frustrated with life when it seemed to take me down a road I did not plan on traveling.  Through God’s perfect understanding I now see that some of those roads were necessary to get me to my final destination.  A place of peace, comfort, healing, and the best of all…  The presence of my Lord and Savior!

Embrace the challenges in your life because if you allow them to, they can make you a better you. 

Another sweet reminder of how faithful God has been to us!!!  Although this was the start of what would be one of the most trying times of our lives, this was also the last time David ever had a seizure. He is been seizure free for three years today!

One of my students reads his first word!

This is what makes being a Special Education Teacher so rewarding.

I just got overly excited about receiving my shipment of Mod Podge!!!  First day all week I haven't worked +10.   It was worth it because now I'm enjoying my evening winding down with David making Valentine treat bags. 😍 I think I'm officially old and loving it!!!!

Some of the hardest yet most rewarding decisions I have ever had to make in my life have entailed choosing to not waist time, energy, and/or emotions on people or things not worth my time, energy, and/or emotions.  :)

Finding the strengthen to put yourself first and patiently wait for what you are worth is a virtue worth developing.  Never settle for anything or anyone less than the best God has for you!   

Lots of prayers needed today... Just received a call from my mom and the reason I have not heard from her in a couple of weeks is because she was in the infirmary with pneumonia. She's recovering and getting better, but please say a special prayer for her recovery.  Also sending lots of prayers for peace and comfort to the Lord family, as they lay there sweet angel Mia to rest today.  

Every day of life is just another opportunity for Gods glory to shine through a circumstance.

David is officially mine forever... 

Guardianship granted!  1/29/2015

Never loose Faith

No matter what life throws my way, what challenges I have to endure, or how different my plans might differ from the Lord's plan for me, the one thing that will never change is my aspirations.  What happens to us on this earth is temporary and does not matter.  What does matter is how you face life.  Throughout your journey make a conscious decision to face life with the same faith, when times are good and when times are not so pleasant.  That is one of few choices we have in what happens to us on this earth.  I choose to aspire to be Christ-like in everything I do and everything I go through.  

#neverloosefaith  #Godwillneverleaveyouorforsakeyou

Guess whose amazing students made it on Fox 10 News today?

http://www.fox10phoenix.com/Clip/11033484/cory-goes-back-to-school-ignacio-conchos-school#.VLafgMNLd_8.yahoomail

2014 was filled with a lot of hard lessons learned for me, but they were lessons learned nonetheless. They have prepared me for 2015, which I will enter stronger, wiser, and closer to God than I was the year before. May God bless you all as we ring in the new year. I still believe... THE BEST IS YET TO COME!!!

As I was worshiping God this morning All You've Ever Wanted by Casting Crowns came on.  

I was chasing healing when I'd been made well

I was fighting battles when You conquered hell

Living free but from a prison cell

Lord, I lay it down today

So I'll stop living off of how I feel

And start standing on Your truth revealed

Jesus is my strength, my shield

And He will never fail me

No more chains, I've been set free

No more fighting battles You've won for me

Now in Christ, I stand complete

I needed to hear these words today.  I refuse to be that broken little girl who waisted way to many years bound to the pains of my past.  Today I take a stand, I refuse to get caught up in life's challenges, fighting a battle that God has already won for me.  A price that an innocent man paid for me, for my sins, for my freedom.  God graciously gave his life so that I could live life abundantly, and I will honor his life and mine by doing so!  My prayer today is that those who have not gained that understanding will one day feel God's warm embrace as I have. 

I will not dwell on the past, nor focus on my current circumstance.  I can't afford to focus on anything but Jesus and the blood he shed for me.  I choose to get back up however many times necessary and live my life as a testament of God's faithfulness and grace.

Many blessing to you and yours this CHRISTmas!

    Our first Christmas, where our journey began!

                                

Sometimes the most difficult part of this season for me is making the conscious decision to focus on the amazing blessing we do have, and not the things that have not yet be placed in our life.  It is extremely difficult to make that choice when my hearts longs to have the typical traditional Christmas.  A Holiday filled with family, health, and peace.   I am wishing I had at least my parents to share CHRISTmas with, but that is just not what life is for us right now.  At the moment I am holding on to the memory of my dad and the random 3 minute phone calls I get from my mom from prison.   It can make this month an extremely lonely time, but I know I have been blessed with the best kid a mom could ask for, a great church,  a spectacular life, and the opportunity to allow God to fill the void in my life!





This year CHRISTmas has come and gone and I have struggled to find time to breath and take it all in.  We will not be spending the Holidays the way I anticipated we would, but will be doing things exactly how God had planned!  David and I have decided to stay in for the Holidays. No travels, no outings, no running away from life. David is coming down with a cold and this paranoid mommy rather spend Christmas eve at home caring for him then end up having to spend Christmas day in the Hospital. We are going to have some Jesus Rehab while enjoying hot coco and Vitamin C.

I am so thankful for all the many blessings in our lives! Even the situations that did not or do not always feel so magical at times. Each one of those situations has led David and I right to where we are, and that is exactly where God wants us to be. 

Always remember that although life hurts sometimes and things happen that are beyond our understanding and/or control, one thing we can control is the choices we make to embrace every single opportunity granted to us.  Today I choose to focus on the extraordinary ways God has transformed our lives through the disappointments.  I will focus on the understanding that somethings are not meant to be understood, they are meant to help us grow into the person God intended us to be.  

May God richly bless you and yours with a clear understanding of how majestical he is and may you spend your Holidays reminded of the true reason for the season. 

 Our 18th Christmas, where our journey continues!

I am excited to announce that David will be participating in Arizona Rock 'n' Roll Marathon on January 18^th.  I would love for all of our Team David fans and supporters to share in this extraordinary event with us.

David is going to have the opportunity to run/roll with a partner runner. There's an organization of people who have decided to sponsor a child to share their legs with.  ;)   The thought of David having the opportunity to participate in a marathon is fun and exciting, but more than anything else the mere thought of watching my child roll past the finish line brings tears of joy to my eyes. 

As David has transitioned in to adulthood I have had to come to terms with the fact that there are some dreams I have had for us that need to be laid to rest.  It has been an extremely emotional process that has been difficult for most people to understand.   Every mother naturally wants to watch their child walk or hit milestones that they watch all of their friends children hit. At some point as the mother of a special needs child, you learn to set those disappointments aside so that you can embrace the journey you have been chosen for. 

That being said, it does not make the process any less heart wrenching for a mother.   You eventually learn to focus on all the amazing things your child can do.  But there are some dreams that are hard to let go of, so you tuck those ones far away so that they don’t haunt you.  Watching David miss out on typical experiences has been the hardest part of this process for me.  As his mother I want nothing more than to give my bright eyed, courageous, hero all the opportunities that children with out medical challenges have, but some days I don’t feel too successful. 

There are some experiences you don’t think you'll be afforded the opportunity to see here on this earth.  Surprisingly sometimes you are!  To me this experience is God gently whispering to me that he hears the cries of my heart. God is reminding me that although reaching our dreams might not look as though I thought they would, God is still granting us our dreams in a different form.  Watching my child participate in a marathon and roll past a finish line will be a dream come true for us!!!!

THANK YOU RUNNERS AND BEST BUDDIES!!!!!   Thank you for giving us a gift that money could never buy, an opportunity to see my child do something that I never thought I'd get to see him do. Thank you for putting a smile on this mommies face.  When you have to go without you learn to appreciate the little things.  In the process you gain an understanding of the true value of such cherished experiences.  A cherished gift from you to us!  THANK YOU ;)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjI9nMAFylc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cAw35xPqbMs

David got served!!!  Lol  Our guardianship hearing will be on January 29th.